The New Sunday Times runs a story today about unwanted babies. Young girls, unmarried, give birth and leave these babies anywhere, to let them die or in the hope that someone finds and takes care of them.
Others abort, illegally.
The big question asked in this article is why is this happening?
Fear is mentioned in the story - social stigma, not knowing where to go.
Sex in Malaysia is still a taboo, and what and how to introduce sex education in schools is still debated. While the authorities debate, teenagers and pre-teens know about sex already. Heck, even my kid asks me, and he is eight!
If a girl gets pregnant, the sky is coming down. Not only in Asia, but all across the world. I believe that is no father or mother around who wishes their daughter gets pregnant when she is 14, 15, 16, or, may be even 20. Or, that their son is coming one evening and says that his girlfriend is pregnant. Way too young.
It can happen, nevertheless, don't be fooled. There is no way that rules and regulations, laws or whatever can prevent or separate gender from getting engaged with each other. Children and teens get to know about sex very early nowadays and if the "older generation" doesn't talk about it and educate, open and honest, without threats but with trust, then unwanted pregnancies happen. It is not possible to forbid sex, and it is clear that sex is entering children's life earlier and earlier. No judgment about this.
If it happens, trust and confidence HAS to be there. There is no other way around. The trust of the girl (but this doesn't exclude the boy) that she can go to the parents and confess to her pregnancy. That she has the trust and confidence that there is empathy, understanding, tolerance and more in the parents. Gosh, parents were not always angels when they were young either. I wasn't, for one!
Only, and only if this feelings exist will the girl be able to stand up to what happened. If it is not existing (and read this as contrasting view), and blame is prevalent, if there is the fear that she is shown the door - "what will the neighbours say?", may be if she gets beaten, then, there is the high possibility that she is trying to hide the boyfriend, that she or he engages in sex, and may be a pregnancy.
I don't believe that to leave a baby somewhere is an easy decision.
Just imagine the choices. The choice is that she either has to go to her parents and confess to pregnancy or tries to hide the pregancy, delivers the baby secretly and leaves the baby somewhere. Ask yourself: How much fear and mistrust must someone have to go for the second option?
Something terribly wrong and very, very sad is taking place here.
(NLP in Asia)
nlp
neuro linguistic programming
executive coaching
business coaching
personal coaching
training
nlp malaysia
hypnosis
hypnotherapy
leadership
Thursday, August 31, 2006
Tuesday, August 22, 2006
The power of suggestion: Hypnosis
Great article on hypnosis, published on August 20, 2006.
"The power of suggestion: Hypnosis
Hypnosis increasingly is used as serious therapy to help patients control pain and anxiety and alleviate symptoms.
Story by LISA LIDDANE
The Orange County Register
For a long time, hypnosis has been the Rodney Dangerfield of health care.
Yes, researchers have long been curious – even as they learn more – about the relationship of mind to body.
Still, among traditional practitioners of big-money, big-education style Western medicine, a practice used by magicians and carnival tricksters hasn't held much sway as serious therapy.
But that may be changing. A growing body of research indicates that hypnosis can help people quit smoking, blunt physical pain and decrease the symptoms of, among other things, irritable bowel syndrome. As a result, hypnosis is popping up as a health tool in places where it was once shunned.
"Hypnosis puts people in a state of hyper-relaxation," said Stephanie Buehler, a licensed clinical psychologist who uses hypnosis at the Center for Optimal Health in Irvine. "(While under hypnosis) a lot of the usual defenses are usually resolved, so that people are receptive to suggestions and more capable of incorporating them."
Researchers recently have shown what happens in the brains of people who are hypnotized. A 2005 study published in Proceedings of the National Academies showed that people under hypnosis demonstrated less activity in the part of the brain called the anterior cingulate cortex – which is linked to decision-making – than did people who weren't hypnotized.
Such studies are gradually stripping hypnosis of its showbiz history and legitimizing it in medical offices and hospitals. Doctors, nurses and psychologists increasingly use hypnosis to complement standard treatments. Likewise, an increasing number of patients seek out hypnosis as an alternative to more invasive treatments or drugs.
Buehler says she's used it to help patients manage phobias, such as fear of flying.
"I can put (patients) under hypnosis and desensitize them to the entire process of getting on the plane, the plane taking off, the patients being afraid of the flight, the plane landing and the patients exiting. Under hypnosis, I can teach them to go from something they are afraid of to a safe place. I can teach them that they can have some control and that they can relax."
At Children's Hospital of Orange County in Orange, nurses and psychologists help children manage anxiety and pain with self-hypnosis, said Heather Huszti, director of training for the psychology program at CHOC.
"It's not a substitute for pain medications, but a way to help medications work better," she explained, adding that patients practicing self-hypnosis sometimes require less pain medications.
In January, CHOC will kick off a training program to expand and deepen its health-care givers' understanding and experience in hypnosis, Huszti said.
Of late, self-hypnosis has joined the ranks of the Bradley Method and Lamaze as a popular tool for women to manage the pain of childbirth.
Before getting pregnant in 2004, Cassidy Feliciano of Cypress was determined to avoid epidural anesthesia during labor and delivery. "I didn't want any drugs for me and my baby," she said. So she took hypnosis-assisted birthing classes once a week for five weeks, starting during the sixth month of her pregnancy. Every night for three months, Feliciano, 31, practiced self-hypnosis techniques.
When she went into labor, she knew how to mentally block out the pain.
"I imagined a safe place," she said. "I was sitting in the park with the baby in my arms and my husband behind me. The park is a place we went to several times for picnics before we were even pregnant. It has a lake, with ducks swimming around. I was sitting on a blanket with my knees propped up and I was cradling the baby on my lap. My husband was kneeling behind me, his hand relaxed on my shoulder. His hand was my cue to go deeper into hypnosis."
Feliciano felt calm throughout the process. "It was never really painful. I felt pressure – just pressure, even though I had a sizable tear."
After Feliciano delivered her son, she felt euphoric. "I felt so empowered that my body could do what it did and that my mind had the power over my body to create a painless childbirth."
But some people are more susceptible to hypnosis than others, says Dr. David Spiegel, a prominent hypnosis researcher and associate chairman of the department of psychiatry and behavioral sciences at Stanford University.
"There's now evidence that genetic factors play a role in hypnotizability," Spiegel said. "Some people have a certain variant of the gene involved in making the neurotransmitter dopamine." Neurotransmitters are chemical messengers in the brain.
Children tend to be more hypnotizable, Spiegel said. Three out of four adults can be hypnotized.
How long the effects of hypnosis last varies. When patients undergo hypnosis with a psychologist and learn self-hypnosis, they acquire tools to help themselves, Buehler said.
Those tools cease to be potent if patients use them infrequently or don't seek help when hypnosis isn't as effective.
And hypnosis doesn't work in vacuum. Buehler points out that people trying to lose weight still need to learn about proper nutrition and exercise so that hypnotic suggestions to make the right food choices can work. And people trying to quit smoking, she said, can still benefit from using a nicotine patch.
Buehler cautioned that it's important to be careful in choosing a health-care provider who is licensed to practice hypnosis. There are numerous hypnotists who can claim to treat a host of medical conditions, but may not be adequately trained to provide hypnosis, Buehler said.
The first step to finding a qualified hypnotist is to get a referral from the American Society of Clinical Hypnosis and the Society for Clinical and Experimental Hypnosis.
Meanwhile, the research on hypnosis continues.
More than a half-dozen clinical trials sponsored by the National Institutes of Health are looking at how hypnosis can help with preparing women for childbirth, alleviating pain during cataract surgery, relieving hot flashes in breast cancer survivors, and decreasing back pain. Researchers at the University of Washington in Seattle and The Alfred hospital in Melbourne, Australia, are conducting studies to find out if virtual-reality-assisted hypnosis can reduce burn victims' anxiety and pain.
"There are studies that show that hypnosis is stronger than the placebo effect," Spiegel said. "It's not mind over matter, but mind matters."
(NLP in Asia)
leadership
nlp
neuro linguistic programming
business coaching
executive coaching
personal coaching
malaysia
hypnotherapy
hypnosis
training
nlp malaysia
"The power of suggestion: Hypnosis
Hypnosis increasingly is used as serious therapy to help patients control pain and anxiety and alleviate symptoms.
Story by LISA LIDDANE
The Orange County Register
For a long time, hypnosis has been the Rodney Dangerfield of health care.
Yes, researchers have long been curious – even as they learn more – about the relationship of mind to body.
Still, among traditional practitioners of big-money, big-education style Western medicine, a practice used by magicians and carnival tricksters hasn't held much sway as serious therapy.
But that may be changing. A growing body of research indicates that hypnosis can help people quit smoking, blunt physical pain and decrease the symptoms of, among other things, irritable bowel syndrome. As a result, hypnosis is popping up as a health tool in places where it was once shunned.
"Hypnosis puts people in a state of hyper-relaxation," said Stephanie Buehler, a licensed clinical psychologist who uses hypnosis at the Center for Optimal Health in Irvine. "(While under hypnosis) a lot of the usual defenses are usually resolved, so that people are receptive to suggestions and more capable of incorporating them."
Researchers recently have shown what happens in the brains of people who are hypnotized. A 2005 study published in Proceedings of the National Academies showed that people under hypnosis demonstrated less activity in the part of the brain called the anterior cingulate cortex – which is linked to decision-making – than did people who weren't hypnotized.
Such studies are gradually stripping hypnosis of its showbiz history and legitimizing it in medical offices and hospitals. Doctors, nurses and psychologists increasingly use hypnosis to complement standard treatments. Likewise, an increasing number of patients seek out hypnosis as an alternative to more invasive treatments or drugs.
Buehler says she's used it to help patients manage phobias, such as fear of flying.
"I can put (patients) under hypnosis and desensitize them to the entire process of getting on the plane, the plane taking off, the patients being afraid of the flight, the plane landing and the patients exiting. Under hypnosis, I can teach them to go from something they are afraid of to a safe place. I can teach them that they can have some control and that they can relax."
At Children's Hospital of Orange County in Orange, nurses and psychologists help children manage anxiety and pain with self-hypnosis, said Heather Huszti, director of training for the psychology program at CHOC.
"It's not a substitute for pain medications, but a way to help medications work better," she explained, adding that patients practicing self-hypnosis sometimes require less pain medications.
In January, CHOC will kick off a training program to expand and deepen its health-care givers' understanding and experience in hypnosis, Huszti said.
Of late, self-hypnosis has joined the ranks of the Bradley Method and Lamaze as a popular tool for women to manage the pain of childbirth.
Before getting pregnant in 2004, Cassidy Feliciano of Cypress was determined to avoid epidural anesthesia during labor and delivery. "I didn't want any drugs for me and my baby," she said. So she took hypnosis-assisted birthing classes once a week for five weeks, starting during the sixth month of her pregnancy. Every night for three months, Feliciano, 31, practiced self-hypnosis techniques.
When she went into labor, she knew how to mentally block out the pain.
"I imagined a safe place," she said. "I was sitting in the park with the baby in my arms and my husband behind me. The park is a place we went to several times for picnics before we were even pregnant. It has a lake, with ducks swimming around. I was sitting on a blanket with my knees propped up and I was cradling the baby on my lap. My husband was kneeling behind me, his hand relaxed on my shoulder. His hand was my cue to go deeper into hypnosis."
Feliciano felt calm throughout the process. "It was never really painful. I felt pressure – just pressure, even though I had a sizable tear."
After Feliciano delivered her son, she felt euphoric. "I felt so empowered that my body could do what it did and that my mind had the power over my body to create a painless childbirth."
But some people are more susceptible to hypnosis than others, says Dr. David Spiegel, a prominent hypnosis researcher and associate chairman of the department of psychiatry and behavioral sciences at Stanford University.
"There's now evidence that genetic factors play a role in hypnotizability," Spiegel said. "Some people have a certain variant of the gene involved in making the neurotransmitter dopamine." Neurotransmitters are chemical messengers in the brain.
Children tend to be more hypnotizable, Spiegel said. Three out of four adults can be hypnotized.
How long the effects of hypnosis last varies. When patients undergo hypnosis with a psychologist and learn self-hypnosis, they acquire tools to help themselves, Buehler said.
Those tools cease to be potent if patients use them infrequently or don't seek help when hypnosis isn't as effective.
And hypnosis doesn't work in vacuum. Buehler points out that people trying to lose weight still need to learn about proper nutrition and exercise so that hypnotic suggestions to make the right food choices can work. And people trying to quit smoking, she said, can still benefit from using a nicotine patch.
Buehler cautioned that it's important to be careful in choosing a health-care provider who is licensed to practice hypnosis. There are numerous hypnotists who can claim to treat a host of medical conditions, but may not be adequately trained to provide hypnosis, Buehler said.
The first step to finding a qualified hypnotist is to get a referral from the American Society of Clinical Hypnosis and the Society for Clinical and Experimental Hypnosis.
Meanwhile, the research on hypnosis continues.
More than a half-dozen clinical trials sponsored by the National Institutes of Health are looking at how hypnosis can help with preparing women for childbirth, alleviating pain during cataract surgery, relieving hot flashes in breast cancer survivors, and decreasing back pain. Researchers at the University of Washington in Seattle and The Alfred hospital in Melbourne, Australia, are conducting studies to find out if virtual-reality-assisted hypnosis can reduce burn victims' anxiety and pain.
"There are studies that show that hypnosis is stronger than the placebo effect," Spiegel said. "It's not mind over matter, but mind matters."
(NLP in Asia)
leadership
nlp
neuro linguistic programming
business coaching
executive coaching
personal coaching
malaysia
hypnotherapy
hypnosis
training
nlp malaysia
Confidence - you have it or you don't?
For some people, it is really tough standing up in front of a crowd to introduce yourself. I know the feeling myself. The butterflies flying wildly, like a stirred up hornet nest.
Worse of all is when you REALLY have to say something and then, all that comes out is stuttering and a, for you, embarrassing mumble, incoherent and rambling.
Know the feeling?
Tough, especially, when you are a small business owner, who wants to grow the business. The one I met this morning didn't say anything, didn't have to get up. But I, and others, could see the working inside of him.
What holds you back? I don't know, but I can relate to the situation.
I had it once, in a conference, a long time back in Singapore. I started to speak, and, while I was somewhat prepared, I realised, after about 3 slides, heck, this is going wrong - the moment the thought was in my mind, I froze. I looked at the audience. A second went by, and then a second. I took a deep breath, opened my mouth and said - "this is going wrong, you are totally not with me, and I am losing myself. Let me go back and start again."
I did, and I performed magically. Well, at least not that bad.
Wow, it was something that I still think about, but I learnt the lessons and realised that, what I need to have is VERY good knowledge about the topic that I am talking about. Next, I need to have the confidence to present what I prepared. And then, a great attitude of what I can do.
At that time, I didn't know NLP or didn't relate to anything mind-related. Nowadays, I do know that I do have a space on my own, and I carry my circle of excellence with me.
But that is me and how I manage myself, now.
Back to this morning. I simply wonder if the guy realises that as a business man, probably successful, he has already developed something that is applicable to the rest of his life. This man build up a business, which is not easy, I tell you. He must have had the confidence to start it up and follow through. He must have believed in himself that he can manage that.
There is an easy application in NLP, called contrastive analysis, to find out, what got him started in his business life and the respective drivers or triggers, vis-a-vis what is holding him back. In a further step, the triggers that got him started will then be "transplanted" to overlap and eliminate those that hold him back - a change should start to happen then already. Okay, this is NLP 1-1 and there might be more in the person that needs to be cleared up, and there are plenty of other possibilities and ways to get him over that state, but it is a start.
But I believe that there are many out there who lack confidence and are plagued by anxiety. Not nice, is it?
(NLP in Asia)
leadership
nlp
neuro linguistic programming
business coaching
executive coaching
personal coaching
malaysia
hypnotherapy
hypnosis
training
nlp malaysia
Worse of all is when you REALLY have to say something and then, all that comes out is stuttering and a, for you, embarrassing mumble, incoherent and rambling.
Know the feeling?
Tough, especially, when you are a small business owner, who wants to grow the business. The one I met this morning didn't say anything, didn't have to get up. But I, and others, could see the working inside of him.
What holds you back? I don't know, but I can relate to the situation.
I had it once, in a conference, a long time back in Singapore. I started to speak, and, while I was somewhat prepared, I realised, after about 3 slides, heck, this is going wrong - the moment the thought was in my mind, I froze. I looked at the audience. A second went by, and then a second. I took a deep breath, opened my mouth and said - "this is going wrong, you are totally not with me, and I am losing myself. Let me go back and start again."
I did, and I performed magically. Well, at least not that bad.
Wow, it was something that I still think about, but I learnt the lessons and realised that, what I need to have is VERY good knowledge about the topic that I am talking about. Next, I need to have the confidence to present what I prepared. And then, a great attitude of what I can do.
At that time, I didn't know NLP or didn't relate to anything mind-related. Nowadays, I do know that I do have a space on my own, and I carry my circle of excellence with me.
But that is me and how I manage myself, now.
Back to this morning. I simply wonder if the guy realises that as a business man, probably successful, he has already developed something that is applicable to the rest of his life. This man build up a business, which is not easy, I tell you. He must have had the confidence to start it up and follow through. He must have believed in himself that he can manage that.
There is an easy application in NLP, called contrastive analysis, to find out, what got him started in his business life and the respective drivers or triggers, vis-a-vis what is holding him back. In a further step, the triggers that got him started will then be "transplanted" to overlap and eliminate those that hold him back - a change should start to happen then already. Okay, this is NLP 1-1 and there might be more in the person that needs to be cleared up, and there are plenty of other possibilities and ways to get him over that state, but it is a start.
But I believe that there are many out there who lack confidence and are plagued by anxiety. Not nice, is it?
(NLP in Asia)
leadership
nlp
neuro linguistic programming
business coaching
executive coaching
personal coaching
malaysia
hypnotherapy
hypnosis
training
nlp malaysia
Monday, August 21, 2006
Bowling and life strategies
You know that you can translate the way of bowling, or how you bowl into your life strategies - or, to go a step further, into your organisation.
There were guys and girls that played bowling excellently, but who face different challenges in their life. Challenges, may be such as being stuck in their current career. Not getting along and moving forward in life and profession. For whatever reasons, may be early school dropouts, or not completing school, or completing school but not to the highest level possible. The administrators, receptionists, or those that do clerical work. May be even those at a higher level but that got stuck there for a long time already and are too lazy to move out to a new job.
Many of them played bowling so extremely well. What drove them to succeed in bowling, or in any other sport activity, for that matter?
They focused on the pins and the balls. I could see it in their body posture, in the glimmer in their eyes. The way they rolled the ball. The celebration after the strike.
There are similarities that one can think of when you translate these successes into your life. Translation into your life means to really think of what you did during your successes and then do the same stuff in your other life - thus, focus on the process and not on the context in which you operate (heavy words, I know!).
Such as:
- Be focussed on what you want and plan it out in detail. From the last step, work your way backwards (I don't need to say, write it down and take it along with you, don't I?). So, where do you focus on? On the next break, the lunch ahead, the girl- or boyfriend waiting for you? Or, really, the task at hand?;
- How do you hold your body? Is it slumped forward, taking a position of a beaten person, or someone, who is upbeat in facing the challenges of life? (hey - that makes a difference to your mind, okay!!!!) - one tip. Look upwards
- What is going on inside of you? What do you say to yourself? Good things or bad things?;
- How do you frame what you do? Is it only a game, or do you want to get better? Do you excuse yourself when you didn't get the strike, or do you find out why you didn't make it? Do you change your way of doing things, when things don't go your way?
- What do you feel, see and hear, inside of you, in your head, stomach and heart, when you start doing something;
- How do you celebrate your successes? Do you celebrate the small successes and victories - I have a strike - or only on the last, final number? I tell you, it is great to celebrate the small steps, because small victories lead to success!! No success was won over night!!!!
Now, if you succeed in one area of your life that is great. All you have to do is to observe yourself and answer those questions - and then do the magic: Translate these answers of your success in one part to other parts of your life and you know what? You will start winning. May be not tomorrow, and not the day after. But with persistency, you will get better and get into the habit of winning in your life - the life outside of sport. How is that?
(NLP in Asia)
leadership
nlp
neuro linguistic programming
business coaching
executive coaching
personal coaching
malaysia
hypnotherapy
hypnosis
training
nlp malaysia
There were guys and girls that played bowling excellently, but who face different challenges in their life. Challenges, may be such as being stuck in their current career. Not getting along and moving forward in life and profession. For whatever reasons, may be early school dropouts, or not completing school, or completing school but not to the highest level possible. The administrators, receptionists, or those that do clerical work. May be even those at a higher level but that got stuck there for a long time already and are too lazy to move out to a new job.
Many of them played bowling so extremely well. What drove them to succeed in bowling, or in any other sport activity, for that matter?
They focused on the pins and the balls. I could see it in their body posture, in the glimmer in their eyes. The way they rolled the ball. The celebration after the strike.
There are similarities that one can think of when you translate these successes into your life. Translation into your life means to really think of what you did during your successes and then do the same stuff in your other life - thus, focus on the process and not on the context in which you operate (heavy words, I know!).
Such as:
- Be focussed on what you want and plan it out in detail. From the last step, work your way backwards (I don't need to say, write it down and take it along with you, don't I?). So, where do you focus on? On the next break, the lunch ahead, the girl- or boyfriend waiting for you? Or, really, the task at hand?;
- How do you hold your body? Is it slumped forward, taking a position of a beaten person, or someone, who is upbeat in facing the challenges of life? (hey - that makes a difference to your mind, okay!!!!) - one tip. Look upwards
- What is going on inside of you? What do you say to yourself? Good things or bad things?;
- How do you frame what you do? Is it only a game, or do you want to get better? Do you excuse yourself when you didn't get the strike, or do you find out why you didn't make it? Do you change your way of doing things, when things don't go your way?
- What do you feel, see and hear, inside of you, in your head, stomach and heart, when you start doing something;
- How do you celebrate your successes? Do you celebrate the small successes and victories - I have a strike - or only on the last, final number? I tell you, it is great to celebrate the small steps, because small victories lead to success!! No success was won over night!!!!
Now, if you succeed in one area of your life that is great. All you have to do is to observe yourself and answer those questions - and then do the magic: Translate these answers of your success in one part to other parts of your life and you know what? You will start winning. May be not tomorrow, and not the day after. But with persistency, you will get better and get into the habit of winning in your life - the life outside of sport. How is that?
(NLP in Asia)
leadership
nlp
neuro linguistic programming
business coaching
executive coaching
personal coaching
malaysia
hypnotherapy
hypnosis
training
nlp malaysia
Saturday, August 19, 2006
Bowling and focus
I am not a regular bowler, even so I enjoy the game. Most of the time, I have played with luck, was happy when I got a strike, and mostly got one by luck and chance.
I hardly ever won, before that day, and that is okay, because, well, I knew I wasn't that good.
Last Friday, the company went out on a bowling competiton. We reserved about 20 lanes and it was fun.
(taken from www.tabradys.missouri.edu)
And I focused, very intensively. Focused on the point, I wanted the ball (is it called ball?) to go to. So the ball moving, rolling, and smashing into the pin that I selected. Spoke to me - and the ball - that I want to get it on that point on the track, and get to the right point.
Then I let go.
It didn't always work, of course. There were many, many players around me that were way, way better. Nevertheless, I have to say that I played my best two games. Okay, my highest score was 125 or so, but hey - for someone who never reached 100 before, that is great! And it feels real good to have a couple of great strikes in a game!
(taken from http://www.irtc.org/ftp/pub/stills/2005-12-31/bowling.jpg)
And, it simply is my belief that focus on my outcome helped.
(NLP in Asia)
leadership
nlp
neuro linguistic programming
business coaching
executive coaching
personal coaching
malaysia
hypnotherapy
hypnosis
training
nlp malaysia
I hardly ever won, before that day, and that is okay, because, well, I knew I wasn't that good.
Last Friday, the company went out on a bowling competiton. We reserved about 20 lanes and it was fun.
(taken from www.tabradys.missouri.edu)
And I focused, very intensively. Focused on the point, I wanted the ball (is it called ball?) to go to. So the ball moving, rolling, and smashing into the pin that I selected. Spoke to me - and the ball - that I want to get it on that point on the track, and get to the right point.
Then I let go.
It didn't always work, of course. There were many, many players around me that were way, way better. Nevertheless, I have to say that I played my best two games. Okay, my highest score was 125 or so, but hey - for someone who never reached 100 before, that is great! And it feels real good to have a couple of great strikes in a game!
(taken from http://www.irtc.org/ftp/pub/stills/2005-12-31/bowling.jpg)
And, it simply is my belief that focus on my outcome helped.
(NLP in Asia)
leadership
nlp
neuro linguistic programming
business coaching
executive coaching
personal coaching
malaysia
hypnotherapy
hypnosis
training
nlp malaysia
Wednesday, August 16, 2006
If something disturbs you, it can only be you!
Now, this is hardcore NLP and language of the mind. So bear with me, but please be aware that it can also challenge your own thinking.
Let me explain:
One person, let's call him Ted, is doing something, anything, say, like ..... , okay, I make it easy - resting in the office chair. Sitting there, not doing anything, but looking into "thin air".
An executive, called Annie, walks by and says; "What's up Ted, lazy today? Nothing to do?"
Another executive, Sammy, seeing this, chips in: "No, lah, Annie, Ted is just relaxing for a while. He is so incredibly busy."
The same situation, perceived differently.
What is happening?
When I coach or give training, and explain the working of the mind to people, I ask them: "Can you do: "tryeidnduar" for me? Show to the others how you would do a "tryeidnduar"."
I get blank stares. Why? Simple because "tryeidnduar" is a word that does not exist!! Nobody taught you, and you have not thought about it, until I mention "tryeidnduar". This is important, okay!! It was not in your mind at all.
Let's now return to Ted, and his perceived laziness or busi-ness. It is the same story, you know!! If Annie wouldn't have experienced laziness in her own life, if she wouldn't be able to relate to it, she wouldn't know what to call Ted. Because she doesn't know what laziness is.
What is laziness if you have never experienced it!!
Same with Sammy - he knows that this is relaxing, because he knows how to relax.
Got it?
It is in you, it is something VERY, VERY close to you, so be careful when you label people.
In fact, do I dare to say (and I do!!):
If you call people names, offend or insult them, it is in you - may be it is you, in fact!!
If you compliment people on their behaviour, it is also in you.
When we were small, we were told that anytime, we point with the finger to someone and blame the person, at least three fingers would point back to us. Now that is a true saying.
The next time, you feel like cursing and swearing at someone, have a good laughter!! Because, as said, this feeling that goes with it is inside of you. Hahahaha.
(NLP in Asia)
leadership
nlp
neuro linguistic programming
business coaching
executive coaching
personal coaching
malaysia
hypnotherapy
hypnosis
training
nlp malaysia
Let me explain:
One person, let's call him Ted, is doing something, anything, say, like ..... , okay, I make it easy - resting in the office chair. Sitting there, not doing anything, but looking into "thin air".
An executive, called Annie, walks by and says; "What's up Ted, lazy today? Nothing to do?"
Another executive, Sammy, seeing this, chips in: "No, lah, Annie, Ted is just relaxing for a while. He is so incredibly busy."
The same situation, perceived differently.
What is happening?
When I coach or give training, and explain the working of the mind to people, I ask them: "Can you do: "tryeidnduar" for me? Show to the others how you would do a "tryeidnduar"."
I get blank stares. Why? Simple because "tryeidnduar" is a word that does not exist!! Nobody taught you, and you have not thought about it, until I mention "tryeidnduar". This is important, okay!! It was not in your mind at all.
Let's now return to Ted, and his perceived laziness or busi-ness. It is the same story, you know!! If Annie wouldn't have experienced laziness in her own life, if she wouldn't be able to relate to it, she wouldn't know what to call Ted. Because she doesn't know what laziness is.
What is laziness if you have never experienced it!!
Same with Sammy - he knows that this is relaxing, because he knows how to relax.
Got it?
It is in you, it is something VERY, VERY close to you, so be careful when you label people.
In fact, do I dare to say (and I do!!):
If you call people names, offend or insult them, it is in you - may be it is you, in fact!!
If you compliment people on their behaviour, it is also in you.
When we were small, we were told that anytime, we point with the finger to someone and blame the person, at least three fingers would point back to us. Now that is a true saying.
The next time, you feel like cursing and swearing at someone, have a good laughter!! Because, as said, this feeling that goes with it is inside of you. Hahahaha.
(NLP in Asia)
leadership
nlp
neuro linguistic programming
business coaching
executive coaching
personal coaching
malaysia
hypnotherapy
hypnosis
training
nlp malaysia
Wednesday, August 09, 2006
Change - it is up to you
You are responsible for your change. No one else, not even I, as your coach. My job is to ask questions and to guide you, subtly. To open your eyes for more choices available for you and create resources that lay idle inside of you. But ultimately, it is up to you to change - even if you reject my guidance.
There are some who doubt that they cannot be hypnotised. Anybody can be hypnotised, but it is up to the person to get hypnotised.
As Tad James says - "When I ask you to relax, and relax even more, breath deeply, take a deep breath in, and out and now, an even deeper breath. Now, as you relax, close your eyes, and go deeper into relaxation. Your eyes are closed, and every breath you take is taking you deeper into relaxation. Your eyes are closed and in fact, they are so close that you cannot open them. And the more you try to open them, the tigher they close, and the deeper you are in relaxation."
Who is responsible for listening and following? Not me, right? I am just giving directions. It is up to the person to follow instructions and relax, and breathe and go into a trance state. So in fact, it is us who are responsible for change as well.
As easy as that. Easily! And I only give directions, and ask questions.
(NLP in Asia)
leadership
nlp
neuro linguistic programming
business coaching
executive coaching
personal coaching
malaysia
hypnotherapy
hypnosis
training
nlp malaysia
There are some who doubt that they cannot be hypnotised. Anybody can be hypnotised, but it is up to the person to get hypnotised.
As Tad James says - "When I ask you to relax, and relax even more, breath deeply, take a deep breath in, and out and now, an even deeper breath. Now, as you relax, close your eyes, and go deeper into relaxation. Your eyes are closed, and every breath you take is taking you deeper into relaxation. Your eyes are closed and in fact, they are so close that you cannot open them. And the more you try to open them, the tigher they close, and the deeper you are in relaxation."
Who is responsible for listening and following? Not me, right? I am just giving directions. It is up to the person to follow instructions and relax, and breathe and go into a trance state. So in fact, it is us who are responsible for change as well.
As easy as that. Easily! And I only give directions, and ask questions.
(NLP in Asia)
leadership
nlp
neuro linguistic programming
business coaching
executive coaching
personal coaching
malaysia
hypnotherapy
hypnosis
training
nlp malaysia
Tuesday, August 08, 2006
How many times do you need to proof read a document?
I won't answer the question, but - do you actually proof read what you wrote? Or do you depend on Microsoft's word speller?
I think it is important to proof read anything send out - even a blog (something that I neglect too often). For some simple reasons.
Your mind gets used to what you have read and quickly starts to overlook obvious mistakes. You wrote it, what? Got mistakes? No lah!! Then, quickly flipping through the text, signing the letter and sending it out. Or clicking the send-buttong.
Remeber those jokes that are circulated across the web with a lot of spelling mistakes inside that say that the brain only needs to read the beginning of a word and its end to understand it? The same is true with mistakes, only that here, the brain just ignores your mistake.
What to do?
Well, have a short break in between. Don't just send, straight away. Go drink a coffee! Read the text slowly - reaaaalllll sloooooowwwwwwlllllyyyy! If you can, read it out loud to you! Have someone else read your material.
And, if you are lucky, you find the mistake that was hidden in the last line. After you proof-read the text 50 times!
(NLP in Asia)
leadership
nlp
neuro linguistic programming
business coaching
executive coaching
personal coaching
malaysia
hypnotherapy
hypnosis
training
nlp malaysia
I think it is important to proof read anything send out - even a blog (something that I neglect too often). For some simple reasons.
Your mind gets used to what you have read and quickly starts to overlook obvious mistakes. You wrote it, what? Got mistakes? No lah!! Then, quickly flipping through the text, signing the letter and sending it out. Or clicking the send-buttong.
Remeber those jokes that are circulated across the web with a lot of spelling mistakes inside that say that the brain only needs to read the beginning of a word and its end to understand it? The same is true with mistakes, only that here, the brain just ignores your mistake.
What to do?
Well, have a short break in between. Don't just send, straight away. Go drink a coffee! Read the text slowly - reaaaalllll sloooooowwwwwwlllllyyyy! If you can, read it out loud to you! Have someone else read your material.
And, if you are lucky, you find the mistake that was hidden in the last line. After you proof-read the text 50 times!
(NLP in Asia)
leadership
nlp
neuro linguistic programming
business coaching
executive coaching
personal coaching
malaysia
hypnotherapy
hypnosis
training
nlp malaysia
Monday, August 07, 2006
See value in what you do!
I have this colleague. He joined us from India a couple of months ago, came in with great energy and a lot of passion. Everything that he did was done with speed, he walked fast, and talked even faster. A real man of action, a guy that I thought I can learn something from.
His intention was to change everything - everything was too slow, to cumbersome, not really efficient. People with whom he worked made too many mistakes, were not good in what they are doing and so on and so on. To describe all his grievances would fill a page.
Now, he took the initiative and started to talk with other around him, still with full of energy.
Then, a couple of weeks back, the air went out of the balloon. Boof. His speed slowed down. He became frustrated, increasingly. He started to complain that things around him didn't matter anymore. That he is here for only two years, so his intend now is to rip down the time and leave. He is not even sure if it is okay to stay in the company. He doesn't see value anymore.
One of my favourite sayings is that "You have to be the change you want to see." When I talk to him about this he is just blaming everything around him, and asks me, how to change? It is a vicious cycle for him. He believes he can change himself, but that external events hold him back. I see him deteriorating, but he is not willing to see that he has to change first, to accept that not everybody is ready to change, when he is not seeing value.
He expects others to change first before he feels happy or energised again. Do you see the contradiction? It is like, you want to change the whole government, because you are unhappy. Cannot. You have to start with yourself first! You control your thoughts, you are the one who decides to see the negatives or the positives around you.
It is sad to see someone like him to slowly go down. May be over time, he will realise what needs to be done, and turn around. In the meantime, I can only challenge his thinking, when we have a conversation. Hoping to trigger the thought, the idea that initiates the change.
What is the message here for the rest? Well, see a value in what you do or change the way you go about it! Two real simple examples. You go to a movie and realise that it is so very boring. Do you stay and "suffer" or do you leave? My opinion? It was your decision to go, so find something that brings value to you in the movie. Some learning, any learning. Or leave before you waste your time! Or, if you buy a book and it is not what you expect. Well, there are people who like the book, otherwise, it wouldn't have been published. So find the nucket that challenges you, something that you can learn from.
If you don't find a value in what you do or purchase - change the way until it works out for you.
(NLP in Asia)
leadership
nlp
neuro linguistic programming
business coaching
executive coaching
personal coaching
malaysia
hypnotherapy
hypnosis
training
nlp malaysia
His intention was to change everything - everything was too slow, to cumbersome, not really efficient. People with whom he worked made too many mistakes, were not good in what they are doing and so on and so on. To describe all his grievances would fill a page.
Now, he took the initiative and started to talk with other around him, still with full of energy.
Then, a couple of weeks back, the air went out of the balloon. Boof. His speed slowed down. He became frustrated, increasingly. He started to complain that things around him didn't matter anymore. That he is here for only two years, so his intend now is to rip down the time and leave. He is not even sure if it is okay to stay in the company. He doesn't see value anymore.
One of my favourite sayings is that "You have to be the change you want to see." When I talk to him about this he is just blaming everything around him, and asks me, how to change? It is a vicious cycle for him. He believes he can change himself, but that external events hold him back. I see him deteriorating, but he is not willing to see that he has to change first, to accept that not everybody is ready to change, when he is not seeing value.
He expects others to change first before he feels happy or energised again. Do you see the contradiction? It is like, you want to change the whole government, because you are unhappy. Cannot. You have to start with yourself first! You control your thoughts, you are the one who decides to see the negatives or the positives around you.
It is sad to see someone like him to slowly go down. May be over time, he will realise what needs to be done, and turn around. In the meantime, I can only challenge his thinking, when we have a conversation. Hoping to trigger the thought, the idea that initiates the change.
What is the message here for the rest? Well, see a value in what you do or change the way you go about it! Two real simple examples. You go to a movie and realise that it is so very boring. Do you stay and "suffer" or do you leave? My opinion? It was your decision to go, so find something that brings value to you in the movie. Some learning, any learning. Or leave before you waste your time! Or, if you buy a book and it is not what you expect. Well, there are people who like the book, otherwise, it wouldn't have been published. So find the nucket that challenges you, something that you can learn from.
If you don't find a value in what you do or purchase - change the way until it works out for you.
(NLP in Asia)
leadership
nlp
neuro linguistic programming
business coaching
executive coaching
personal coaching
malaysia
hypnotherapy
hypnosis
training
nlp malaysia
Thursday, August 03, 2006
Shut up, when there is nothing to say
We talk. Endlessly. If someone is quiet for a while, we feel compelled to fill the silence. Just to say something. It makes us feel awkward to sit there and be quiet for a while, to feel and enjoy the silence. To know that the other person might need to ponder about a response.
Often, we break the silence.
Then, oftentimes, after we spoke, we regret that we said something. Our inner voice tells us - "Damn, I should have just kept my mouth shut."
Do you know what I am talking about?
In a relationship, when you know that the word you are bound to say is hurting the most. How often are we saying something then, and wooms, hell breaks lose.
In a sales environment, after the perfect presentation, you ask for the sale and the client doesn't respond immediately. Stays quiet. And quiet. The seconds seem to get longer and longer. And, suddenly, you blurr out, try to justify the price, the sale, the ANYTHING. Instead of staying quiet.
Sometimes, it is just enough to be quiet. And let silence talk. Silence is golden, sometimes at least. But, it is an art to stay quiet.
Can you recall a similar situation?
(NLP in Asia)
leadership
nlp
neuro linguistic programming
business coaching
executive coaching
personal coaching
malaysia
hypnotherapy
hypnosis
training
nlp malaysia
Often, we break the silence.
Then, oftentimes, after we spoke, we regret that we said something. Our inner voice tells us - "Damn, I should have just kept my mouth shut."
Do you know what I am talking about?
In a relationship, when you know that the word you are bound to say is hurting the most. How often are we saying something then, and wooms, hell breaks lose.
In a sales environment, after the perfect presentation, you ask for the sale and the client doesn't respond immediately. Stays quiet. And quiet. The seconds seem to get longer and longer. And, suddenly, you blurr out, try to justify the price, the sale, the ANYTHING. Instead of staying quiet.
Sometimes, it is just enough to be quiet. And let silence talk. Silence is golden, sometimes at least. But, it is an art to stay quiet.
Can you recall a similar situation?
(NLP in Asia)
leadership
nlp
neuro linguistic programming
business coaching
executive coaching
personal coaching
malaysia
hypnotherapy
hypnosis
training
nlp malaysia
Friday, July 28, 2006
Stress and hypnotherapy
Great article about hypnotherapy and stress.
One excerpt:
"Stress is a function of our thought patterns and mindset. Stress can be caused by any number of life experiences, but they are nearly all related to fear. Fear of loss, fear of loss of control, fear of ill health, fear of reproof, fear of discovery, fear of failure and fear of success are only a few of these. In truth, 99.9 percent of the things we fear most will never happen. Personally, I have a terrible fear of winning the Lotto. What will I do?
Stress feeds on inaction. The best way to relieve and dissolve anxiety and stress is to do something. If you fear cancer, heart disease or emphysema from smoking, act—quit smoking. If you have stress about your weight or body condition, act—change your diet and exercise to the extent of your ability. If you have stress because of something that happened 10, 20 or 30 years ago, act—release it, get over it and move on. If your stress is caused by yourself or another, act—let it go, forgive yourself and/or the other person and move on.
Hypnosis and hypnotherapy operate in the realm of the mind. In hypnosis, your mind is free to identify, locate and dissolve almost any stress-causing thought, idea, incident or event. This is true. Not because I say it’s true, but because it is the natural way for your mind to react and heal itself from stress. Sometimes, our mind experiences stress we cannot identify or consciously locate. You might think of this as a lock. Hypnosis can be the key that allows you to unlock the secret and allow your mind to identify and correct the imbalance or conflict."
Don't you think it is time to contact a hypnotherapist for your own stress? (ahh - send me a mail, okay!)
Here is the full article, before it disappears from the web:
"Senior issues, emotional conflicts and stress increase in prevalence and seriousness with age. They are probably the most common issues addressed in hypnosis.
As we view our life and the process of aging from the inside, we see stress doing its worst. We are reminded of two primary “rules of the mind.” The rule of “reaction” states that every thought or idea causes a physical reaction. If we stew and obsess about a particular thought, idea, incident or event in our lives, we will cause a physical manifestation of the emotion. The second rule that comes to mind is the rule of “Emotional Persistence,” which states that if we persist in an emotionally-induced symptom long enough, we tend to cause an organic change. Can it be that we bring on our own illness? If the above is true, then it is also possible for us to bring on our own good health, through positive emotional well-being and attitudes.
Most senior issues can be directly related to stress. Stress, like high blood pressure, is a silent killer. Stress depresses the immune system and robs us of life’s enjoyment. If we can decrease the stress level, we can naturally enjoy life more, avoid negative feelings of depression, and live a longer, better and healthier life. A commercial somewhere used the phrase, “Feel how good it feels to feel good again.”
Stress is a function of our thought patterns and mindset. Stress can be caused by any number of life experiences, but they are nearly all related to fear. Fear of loss, fear of loss of control, fear of ill health, fear of reproof, fear of discovery, fear of failure and fear of success are only a few of these. In truth, 99.9 percent of the things we fear most will never happen. Personally, I have a terrible fear of winning the Lotto. What will I do?
Stress feeds on inaction. The best way to relieve and dissolve anxiety and stress is to do something. If you fear cancer, heart disease or emphysema from smoking, act—quit smoking. If you have stress about your weight or body condition, act—change your diet and exercise to the extent of your ability. If you have stress because of something that happened 10, 20 or 30 years ago, act—release it, get over it and move on. If your stress is caused by yourself or another, act—let it go, forgive yourself and/or the other person and move on.
Hypnosis and hypnotherapy operate in the realm of the mind. In hypnosis, your mind is free to identify, locate and dissolve almost any stress-causing thought, idea, incident or event. This is true. Not because I say it’s true, but because it is the natural way for your mind to react and heal itself from stress. Sometimes, our mind experiences stress we cannot identify or consciously locate. You might think of this as a lock. Hypnosis can be the key that allows you to unlock the secret and allow your mind to identify and correct the imbalance or conflict.
It is as though you’ve been running a race; in a big, heavy, canvas diver’s suit, with iron boots and a heavy, brass diving helmet, with only three tiny windows. The diver’s suit is so much a part of you that you don’t even realize you have it on. In hypnosis, you can look in the mirror. Your creative imagination will immediately offer an alternative to your diver’s suit, and you can be free of the burden. You made that heavy thing, and only you can unmake it. Breathe the cool, fresh air again. Feel the refreshing breeze on your skin. Leave the stress behind—you don’t need it. Hypnotherapy can be the key."
Sad is that the author is another hypnotherapist and not a "user" or reporter". Anyway, at least he has the space in a newspaper to create awareness for hypnotherapy. Why do I say so? Because hypnotherapy still has not got the space that it deserves.
(NLP in Asia)
leadership
nlp
neuro linguistic programming
business coaching
executive coaching
personal coaching
malaysia
hypnotherapy
hypnosis
training
nlp malaysia
One excerpt:
"Stress is a function of our thought patterns and mindset. Stress can be caused by any number of life experiences, but they are nearly all related to fear. Fear of loss, fear of loss of control, fear of ill health, fear of reproof, fear of discovery, fear of failure and fear of success are only a few of these. In truth, 99.9 percent of the things we fear most will never happen. Personally, I have a terrible fear of winning the Lotto. What will I do?
Stress feeds on inaction. The best way to relieve and dissolve anxiety and stress is to do something. If you fear cancer, heart disease or emphysema from smoking, act—quit smoking. If you have stress about your weight or body condition, act—change your diet and exercise to the extent of your ability. If you have stress because of something that happened 10, 20 or 30 years ago, act—release it, get over it and move on. If your stress is caused by yourself or another, act—let it go, forgive yourself and/or the other person and move on.
Hypnosis and hypnotherapy operate in the realm of the mind. In hypnosis, your mind is free to identify, locate and dissolve almost any stress-causing thought, idea, incident or event. This is true. Not because I say it’s true, but because it is the natural way for your mind to react and heal itself from stress. Sometimes, our mind experiences stress we cannot identify or consciously locate. You might think of this as a lock. Hypnosis can be the key that allows you to unlock the secret and allow your mind to identify and correct the imbalance or conflict."
Don't you think it is time to contact a hypnotherapist for your own stress? (ahh - send me a mail, okay!)
Here is the full article, before it disappears from the web:
"Senior issues, emotional conflicts and stress increase in prevalence and seriousness with age. They are probably the most common issues addressed in hypnosis.
As we view our life and the process of aging from the inside, we see stress doing its worst. We are reminded of two primary “rules of the mind.” The rule of “reaction” states that every thought or idea causes a physical reaction. If we stew and obsess about a particular thought, idea, incident or event in our lives, we will cause a physical manifestation of the emotion. The second rule that comes to mind is the rule of “Emotional Persistence,” which states that if we persist in an emotionally-induced symptom long enough, we tend to cause an organic change. Can it be that we bring on our own illness? If the above is true, then it is also possible for us to bring on our own good health, through positive emotional well-being and attitudes.
Most senior issues can be directly related to stress. Stress, like high blood pressure, is a silent killer. Stress depresses the immune system and robs us of life’s enjoyment. If we can decrease the stress level, we can naturally enjoy life more, avoid negative feelings of depression, and live a longer, better and healthier life. A commercial somewhere used the phrase, “Feel how good it feels to feel good again.”
Stress is a function of our thought patterns and mindset. Stress can be caused by any number of life experiences, but they are nearly all related to fear. Fear of loss, fear of loss of control, fear of ill health, fear of reproof, fear of discovery, fear of failure and fear of success are only a few of these. In truth, 99.9 percent of the things we fear most will never happen. Personally, I have a terrible fear of winning the Lotto. What will I do?
Stress feeds on inaction. The best way to relieve and dissolve anxiety and stress is to do something. If you fear cancer, heart disease or emphysema from smoking, act—quit smoking. If you have stress about your weight or body condition, act—change your diet and exercise to the extent of your ability. If you have stress because of something that happened 10, 20 or 30 years ago, act—release it, get over it and move on. If your stress is caused by yourself or another, act—let it go, forgive yourself and/or the other person and move on.
Hypnosis and hypnotherapy operate in the realm of the mind. In hypnosis, your mind is free to identify, locate and dissolve almost any stress-causing thought, idea, incident or event. This is true. Not because I say it’s true, but because it is the natural way for your mind to react and heal itself from stress. Sometimes, our mind experiences stress we cannot identify or consciously locate. You might think of this as a lock. Hypnosis can be the key that allows you to unlock the secret and allow your mind to identify and correct the imbalance or conflict.
It is as though you’ve been running a race; in a big, heavy, canvas diver’s suit, with iron boots and a heavy, brass diving helmet, with only three tiny windows. The diver’s suit is so much a part of you that you don’t even realize you have it on. In hypnosis, you can look in the mirror. Your creative imagination will immediately offer an alternative to your diver’s suit, and you can be free of the burden. You made that heavy thing, and only you can unmake it. Breathe the cool, fresh air again. Feel the refreshing breeze on your skin. Leave the stress behind—you don’t need it. Hypnotherapy can be the key."
Sad is that the author is another hypnotherapist and not a "user" or reporter". Anyway, at least he has the space in a newspaper to create awareness for hypnotherapy. Why do I say so? Because hypnotherapy still has not got the space that it deserves.
(NLP in Asia)
leadership
nlp
neuro linguistic programming
business coaching
executive coaching
personal coaching
malaysia
hypnotherapy
hypnosis
training
nlp malaysia
Wednesday, July 26, 2006
Zombies in your head
I have been fascinated lately, just looking at people. Looking into their eyes and seeing different things. Fear, confusion, weariness, or, alternatively, confidence, energy, fun, passion and compassion.
How does this happen that there are so many people look differently at the world, have different perception of the world?
It is the way we evaluate the events that come to us and enter our body through the different senses. We classify, organise and segment those events and then, finally, judge them, according to what we perceive to be true.
There was a time, when this was different. When nothing hold you back, when anyone just goes for it. A time, when it didn't matter that you fall on your backside when you started to learn something new. When curiosity drove your behaviour.
This was the time before school, before educational rules and regulations, before all the "Don't do this" and "don't do that" of uncles and aunties. A care-free time.
Over time, neurochemicals and electrical activity in your mind started to implement filters on your world. You learnt to distort, generalise and delete incoming information. Your mind had to do it, because simply, you would be overwhelmed if it wouldn't do it. There are two million bits of information per second that the brain has to come to terms with - information from your internal and external world.
The brain is not able to hold onto all the information at once, but need to impose order onto it. Especially since it can only hold 7 +/- 2 pieces of information at any one time, equivalent about 134 kb!! Imagine that! From 2 million bits of information down to 134 kb. You do the math, will you? Than you know how much is taken away.
So the brain imposes an order onto it - so what? I talked about filters above, and that these filters determine how we see, and evaluate the world and label our experiences. the 134 kbs that are left are the way we see the world.
What is the impact? Ever wondered why people describe the same event differently? Be it a car accident, be it a movie, be it a political situation.
That is the way they look at the world and how they filter information!
That is the impact of these zombies in your head. It is so very easy to see the different filters at work, when someone writes blogs.
If someone has been trained to see things in a negative or positive light or even with hate, everything is negative, positive or hateful. If someone was told, often enough, that he or she is a no good, sure they doubt themselves, are constantly worried or question their own behaviour.
There is nothing wrong with that, that is not what I am saying. But the challenge is to understand and possibly change those limited beliefs - they are holding us - you, me and everyone else - back in our development.
They are like clusters in our mind. They are the zombies in our mind that question our actions. The zombies that don't allow us to see the miracles all around us. The zombies that are hiding from our discovery because they are burried deep, deep inside of our mind, even so they are so visible in all your actions, behaviours, words and values.
The zombies that I can see when I look into your eyes, because that is how you look at the world. May be to be fascinated is the wrong word then. More, a sadness inside of me because there is always, always so much greatness inside all humans. Onle that this greatness has been burried by limited beliefs that hold us back.
(Addition: The intention of this entry is to indicate belief systems in other blogs as I perceive them to be. I am not judging those blog entries or their owners and in fact, value the authors by opening up their values to others. They are asking the right questions and are on the way to see positive change in their world.
(NLP in Asia)
leadership
nlp
neuro linguistic programming
business coaching
executive coaching
personal coaching
malaysia
hypnotherapy
hypnosis
training
nlp malaysia
How does this happen that there are so many people look differently at the world, have different perception of the world?
It is the way we evaluate the events that come to us and enter our body through the different senses. We classify, organise and segment those events and then, finally, judge them, according to what we perceive to be true.
There was a time, when this was different. When nothing hold you back, when anyone just goes for it. A time, when it didn't matter that you fall on your backside when you started to learn something new. When curiosity drove your behaviour.
This was the time before school, before educational rules and regulations, before all the "Don't do this" and "don't do that" of uncles and aunties. A care-free time.
Over time, neurochemicals and electrical activity in your mind started to implement filters on your world. You learnt to distort, generalise and delete incoming information. Your mind had to do it, because simply, you would be overwhelmed if it wouldn't do it. There are two million bits of information per second that the brain has to come to terms with - information from your internal and external world.
The brain is not able to hold onto all the information at once, but need to impose order onto it. Especially since it can only hold 7 +/- 2 pieces of information at any one time, equivalent about 134 kb!! Imagine that! From 2 million bits of information down to 134 kb. You do the math, will you? Than you know how much is taken away.
So the brain imposes an order onto it - so what? I talked about filters above, and that these filters determine how we see, and evaluate the world and label our experiences. the 134 kbs that are left are the way we see the world.
What is the impact? Ever wondered why people describe the same event differently? Be it a car accident, be it a movie, be it a political situation.
That is the way they look at the world and how they filter information!
That is the impact of these zombies in your head. It is so very easy to see the different filters at work, when someone writes blogs.
If someone has been trained to see things in a negative or positive light or even with hate, everything is negative, positive or hateful. If someone was told, often enough, that he or she is a no good, sure they doubt themselves, are constantly worried or question their own behaviour.
There is nothing wrong with that, that is not what I am saying. But the challenge is to understand and possibly change those limited beliefs - they are holding us - you, me and everyone else - back in our development.
They are like clusters in our mind. They are the zombies in our mind that question our actions. The zombies that don't allow us to see the miracles all around us. The zombies that are hiding from our discovery because they are burried deep, deep inside of our mind, even so they are so visible in all your actions, behaviours, words and values.
The zombies that I can see when I look into your eyes, because that is how you look at the world. May be to be fascinated is the wrong word then. More, a sadness inside of me because there is always, always so much greatness inside all humans. Onle that this greatness has been burried by limited beliefs that hold us back.
(Addition: The intention of this entry is to indicate belief systems in other blogs as I perceive them to be. I am not judging those blog entries or their owners and in fact, value the authors by opening up their values to others. They are asking the right questions and are on the way to see positive change in their world.
(NLP in Asia)
leadership
nlp
neuro linguistic programming
business coaching
executive coaching
personal coaching
malaysia
hypnotherapy
hypnosis
training
nlp malaysia
Of Bomohs and hypnosis
Last week, the NewsStraits Times published an article about "gullible" victimes who fall prey to some out for quick money.
First of all, it is the victim's belief that makes them not seeing the obvious, but believe those that are out to harm them. When you believe it, you will see it. As simple as that. If you believe the world is bad, you will see the bad things all around you. If you believe the world is good, you start to see the things that are positive and bright side of life. It is, of course not easy to change a lifelong belief just by changing the thought alone. That means those people that had sex with bomohs to get rid of evil spirits really believed in it, despite everything that was told. Hey - Bill Gates had to see the importance of the Internet before he embarked on it.
Once upon a time, there were people that believed the world is flat and that, if you go out too far, you can fall down from the plate. Remember, that may be a while ago, you still believed in Santa Claus (sorry for those that still believe it: he doesn't exist. There were resembling characters a long time ago, so!).
Anyway - let's go back to the bomohs. A common belief might be that these victims were hypnotised. Not true.
A nice description is this one:
"Fact is that hypnosis is a genuine psychological phenomenon that leads a person into a highly focused state of concentration and attention, often associated with relaxation and suggestibility.
People in hypnosis remain in control of themselves and wouldn't do anything they would normally find morally objectionable. All hypnosis is actually self hypnosis with the hypnotherapist acting as a guide to direct your concentration toward the area of change that a person wishes to work on. It's important to remember that hypnosis is not magic, but instead a tool that when used properly over time, can help people break unhealthy habits, overcome insomnia, recall memories and as an anesthetic for managing pain."
It is bad enough that these people have been cheated, really. It is a lesson hard learnt and I hope they got the lesson. But, whatever you believe, it is not hypnosis.
(NLP in Asia)
leadership
nlp
neuro linguistic programming
business coaching
executive coaching
personal coaching
malaysia
hypnotherapy
hypnosis
training
nlp malaysia
First of all, it is the victim's belief that makes them not seeing the obvious, but believe those that are out to harm them. When you believe it, you will see it. As simple as that. If you believe the world is bad, you will see the bad things all around you. If you believe the world is good, you start to see the things that are positive and bright side of life. It is, of course not easy to change a lifelong belief just by changing the thought alone. That means those people that had sex with bomohs to get rid of evil spirits really believed in it, despite everything that was told. Hey - Bill Gates had to see the importance of the Internet before he embarked on it.
Once upon a time, there were people that believed the world is flat and that, if you go out too far, you can fall down from the plate. Remember, that may be a while ago, you still believed in Santa Claus (sorry for those that still believe it: he doesn't exist. There were resembling characters a long time ago, so!).
Anyway - let's go back to the bomohs. A common belief might be that these victims were hypnotised. Not true.
A nice description is this one:
"Fact is that hypnosis is a genuine psychological phenomenon that leads a person into a highly focused state of concentration and attention, often associated with relaxation and suggestibility.
People in hypnosis remain in control of themselves and wouldn't do anything they would normally find morally objectionable. All hypnosis is actually self hypnosis with the hypnotherapist acting as a guide to direct your concentration toward the area of change that a person wishes to work on. It's important to remember that hypnosis is not magic, but instead a tool that when used properly over time, can help people break unhealthy habits, overcome insomnia, recall memories and as an anesthetic for managing pain."
It is bad enough that these people have been cheated, really. It is a lesson hard learnt and I hope they got the lesson. But, whatever you believe, it is not hypnosis.
(NLP in Asia)
leadership
nlp
neuro linguistic programming
business coaching
executive coaching
personal coaching
malaysia
hypnotherapy
hypnosis
training
nlp malaysia
Thursday, July 20, 2006
Mind power can beat pain
An article about a hypnotherapist in the UK.
"An Ipswich man who believes mind power can conquer anything, and watched him in action. Plagued by chronic pain in his legs, pensioner Ron Page was at his wits' end.Respite from the agony came only when he was asleep and even then it was only ever a matter of hours before the constant ache became so bad that it woke him up again. Heavy duty pain-killers prescribed to him by doctors failed to stop the involuntary twitching in his legs and courses of acupuncture proved futile. Believing that nothing could solve the problem it was in sheer desperation that he decided to give Ipswich-based hypnotherapist Jason Newland a try.
Arthritis sufferer Ron Page “A friend of mine saw his card in the post office and told me about it,” said Ron.“I just thought I might as well give it a go as I've tried everything else - acupuncture, a chiropractor. “This is a last resort really!” For six weeks Jason has been visiting Ron in his Norwich Road home, and he invited us along to watch a session.
Sitting in his wheelchair, Ron closed his eyes as Jason's soothing voice took hold. Slowly and calmly Jason asked Ron to relax, to listen to all the noises around him and feel them fading in to the background. Once Ron was completely still he asked him to feel the pain in his foot and to give it a colour and a shape. “A blue square,” Ron murmured in a drowsy voice. “Good,” said Jason. “Now change it in to another colour and shape.
”This routine was repeated several times before Jason eventually asked him to imagine that shape being frozen and turning in to a block of ice. In Ron's mind this 'ice' was then left to sit in a garden and melt away in the sunshine before Jason slowly brought him out of his trance-like state. Although looking slightly bleary-eyed, Ron was immediately able to talk coherently about the experience. “You don't feel that you're just gone,” he said. “I can hear him talking and I can hear noises in the room, but you just relax and focus on his voice and forget about everything else.”
Jason explained: “Some people would call it a trance, but it's really a state of absolute relaxation.“All the background noises are still there. It's very much like when you are on a beach sunbathing and you're completely relaxed. You can still hear all the noises around you, but you might sort of jolt awake. “I get people to visualise their pain in different ways, to see it as a colour or as a shape, and to then visualise that shape moving away from their body. That way they are using a different sensory organ and everything is not focused on the actual physical pain.”
In Ron's case, the problems with his right leg began years ago and, despite a major operation, have never really gone away. He said: “Initially they thought it was to do with a trapped nerve but I've developed arthritis in my ankle now. I used to do a lot of sports years ago and I think that's taken its toll.
“The pain starts in my ankle and spreads across the top of my foot and up through my leg, and because I haven't been able to get about as much, both of my ankles get swollen.” Ron, 74, can't walk far, but can get up to answer his door, and manage the stairs in his house.He admits he was cynical about hypnotherapy but has been genuinely surprised by the quick results.
“The pain is not as bad as it was. I used to sit here and every now and again my leg would jump.“The muscles go into spasms and I can't control it, which is really painful, but over the last few weeks that seems to have stopped. I can now sit here without it twitching all the time.“I really notice the difference at night too.
It used to start twitching as soon as I laid down when I went to bed but that's got much better. I can actually get a good night's sleep now and that hasn't happened for ages.“I know it's not going to be 100 per cent perfect and that I'm never going to be able to get up and run again, but it helps relieve things.”For Jason, 35, seeing the change in Ron has been hugely rewarding. The practising Buddhist, who works in insurance during the day, has chosen to offer his services free-of-charge.“People always ask me why I'm doing it for free,” said Jason.
“They're very cynical about why I don't want to make any money out of it, but I'm a Buddhist and believe very strongly in giving something to someone without getting anything back from it.“Seeing the reactions and the difference in people I treat is enough reward for me.
”Recognising the limits of his hypnotic ability is also important for Jason. “I believe I can help anyone, but what I have to stress to people is that I'm not a doctor, I can't get rid of the causes of pain altogether. “I will only perform hypnotherapy on someone who has checked that their doctor is happy with it first.“The first time I came round here his ankle was so swollen that all I did was some relaxation techniques. “I didn't want to focus on his leg or the pain there until he had been to the doctor and checked that it would be okay for him to see me.”
Jason, of Hadleigh Road, has been practising hypnotherapy for many years and has qualified as a Master Practitioner in Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP) which brings together lots of different therapies, including hypnotherapy.
He said: “Everyone has feelings of confidence and relaxation in them somewhere and what I do is give them a short cut to tap into them. It's a bit like a computer - all those emotions are there on the hard drive but you need some way of accessing them quickly. ”In recent months he has started has decided offering hypnotherapy free of charge, and is building up a core of clients with wideranging problems.
He said: “One lady I have been seeing is preparing for a major operation and is absolutely petrified at the thought of it, so we have been working on relaxation techniques. Another man was going in to hospital for some invasive medical procedures and I actually worked with him in the hospital to help calm him down. I've also helped people prepare for driving tests and overcome a fear of flying.”While Jason's hypnotherapy work is currently restricted to evenings and weekends his ultimate aim is to use his skills within hospitals. He said: “The NHS is becoming much more open to alternative therapies and I really believe that I could help a lot of people.”
(NLP in Asia)
leadership
nlp
neuro linguistic programming
business coaching
executive coaching
personal coaching
malaysia
hypnotherapy
hypnosis
training
nlp malaysia
"An Ipswich man who believes mind power can conquer anything, and watched him in action. Plagued by chronic pain in his legs, pensioner Ron Page was at his wits' end.Respite from the agony came only when he was asleep and even then it was only ever a matter of hours before the constant ache became so bad that it woke him up again. Heavy duty pain-killers prescribed to him by doctors failed to stop the involuntary twitching in his legs and courses of acupuncture proved futile. Believing that nothing could solve the problem it was in sheer desperation that he decided to give Ipswich-based hypnotherapist Jason Newland a try.
Arthritis sufferer Ron Page “A friend of mine saw his card in the post office and told me about it,” said Ron.“I just thought I might as well give it a go as I've tried everything else - acupuncture, a chiropractor. “This is a last resort really!” For six weeks Jason has been visiting Ron in his Norwich Road home, and he invited us along to watch a session.
Sitting in his wheelchair, Ron closed his eyes as Jason's soothing voice took hold. Slowly and calmly Jason asked Ron to relax, to listen to all the noises around him and feel them fading in to the background. Once Ron was completely still he asked him to feel the pain in his foot and to give it a colour and a shape. “A blue square,” Ron murmured in a drowsy voice. “Good,” said Jason. “Now change it in to another colour and shape.
”This routine was repeated several times before Jason eventually asked him to imagine that shape being frozen and turning in to a block of ice. In Ron's mind this 'ice' was then left to sit in a garden and melt away in the sunshine before Jason slowly brought him out of his trance-like state. Although looking slightly bleary-eyed, Ron was immediately able to talk coherently about the experience. “You don't feel that you're just gone,” he said. “I can hear him talking and I can hear noises in the room, but you just relax and focus on his voice and forget about everything else.”
Jason explained: “Some people would call it a trance, but it's really a state of absolute relaxation.“All the background noises are still there. It's very much like when you are on a beach sunbathing and you're completely relaxed. You can still hear all the noises around you, but you might sort of jolt awake. “I get people to visualise their pain in different ways, to see it as a colour or as a shape, and to then visualise that shape moving away from their body. That way they are using a different sensory organ and everything is not focused on the actual physical pain.”
In Ron's case, the problems with his right leg began years ago and, despite a major operation, have never really gone away. He said: “Initially they thought it was to do with a trapped nerve but I've developed arthritis in my ankle now. I used to do a lot of sports years ago and I think that's taken its toll.
“The pain starts in my ankle and spreads across the top of my foot and up through my leg, and because I haven't been able to get about as much, both of my ankles get swollen.” Ron, 74, can't walk far, but can get up to answer his door, and manage the stairs in his house.He admits he was cynical about hypnotherapy but has been genuinely surprised by the quick results.
“The pain is not as bad as it was. I used to sit here and every now and again my leg would jump.“The muscles go into spasms and I can't control it, which is really painful, but over the last few weeks that seems to have stopped. I can now sit here without it twitching all the time.“I really notice the difference at night too.
It used to start twitching as soon as I laid down when I went to bed but that's got much better. I can actually get a good night's sleep now and that hasn't happened for ages.“I know it's not going to be 100 per cent perfect and that I'm never going to be able to get up and run again, but it helps relieve things.”For Jason, 35, seeing the change in Ron has been hugely rewarding. The practising Buddhist, who works in insurance during the day, has chosen to offer his services free-of-charge.“People always ask me why I'm doing it for free,” said Jason.
“They're very cynical about why I don't want to make any money out of it, but I'm a Buddhist and believe very strongly in giving something to someone without getting anything back from it.“Seeing the reactions and the difference in people I treat is enough reward for me.
”Recognising the limits of his hypnotic ability is also important for Jason. “I believe I can help anyone, but what I have to stress to people is that I'm not a doctor, I can't get rid of the causes of pain altogether. “I will only perform hypnotherapy on someone who has checked that their doctor is happy with it first.“The first time I came round here his ankle was so swollen that all I did was some relaxation techniques. “I didn't want to focus on his leg or the pain there until he had been to the doctor and checked that it would be okay for him to see me.”
Jason, of Hadleigh Road, has been practising hypnotherapy for many years and has qualified as a Master Practitioner in Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP) which brings together lots of different therapies, including hypnotherapy.
He said: “Everyone has feelings of confidence and relaxation in them somewhere and what I do is give them a short cut to tap into them. It's a bit like a computer - all those emotions are there on the hard drive but you need some way of accessing them quickly. ”In recent months he has started has decided offering hypnotherapy free of charge, and is building up a core of clients with wideranging problems.
He said: “One lady I have been seeing is preparing for a major operation and is absolutely petrified at the thought of it, so we have been working on relaxation techniques. Another man was going in to hospital for some invasive medical procedures and I actually worked with him in the hospital to help calm him down. I've also helped people prepare for driving tests and overcome a fear of flying.”While Jason's hypnotherapy work is currently restricted to evenings and weekends his ultimate aim is to use his skills within hospitals. He said: “The NHS is becoming much more open to alternative therapies and I really believe that I could help a lot of people.”
(NLP in Asia)
leadership
nlp
neuro linguistic programming
business coaching
executive coaching
personal coaching
malaysia
hypnotherapy
hypnosis
training
nlp malaysia
Wednesday, July 19, 2006
Getting inside their head with writing
It is so important to get the message right in whatever you write. You know why? Look at the way you read your mails. Somehow along the line, we are not trained to speed read or to capture the whole meaning of a document in its whole.
Instead, we are reading word, by word, by word. Some read faster, some read slower but all we do is to repeat the message with the voice in our head. So right now, you were reading "most of us repeat the message with the voice in our head."
Who is the person you, or your subconscious mind, believes most? Most of you will say - "I trust me, I believe me."
Now, when you read the text, the message or the voice of the author is in your mind. Silently, you repeat his message, the message of the author.
How powerful, if the message that is stated on the paper/ screen/ mobile phone is strong and convincing. The writer's voice or intention is in the reader's mind.
Wah ---- Imagine that.
That is where hypnotic language comes in. If you are able to write a message hypnotically, your message goes straight into the recipient's mind. And the mind is than not listening to some boring salesperson, but to its "owner." This is happening with messages that are not even covered up - but those that stare at you, in black and white, from the page or the screen in front of you.
Interesting, isn't it?
So, the challenge of course is to know what makes the recipient tick before you embark on writing a mail, SMS or letter.
What is driving the recipient? It is easy to see when you had have a conversation with the recipient already - you give back their words, in one way or another. Why? Because that is the way they wrote it to you, duh! Change it a bit here and there but when you find something that seems important to them, give it back to them.
These are the words that they liked. So why not repeating them?
If you do not know their style, still, you want to be careful about your writing style. You can use hypnotic language patterns to get the message across, because this will surely work. Don't you think?
(NLP in Asia)
leadership
nlp
neuro linguistic programming
business coaching
executive coaching
personal coaching
malaysia
hypnotherapy
hypnosis
training
nlp malaysia
Instead, we are reading word, by word, by word. Some read faster, some read slower but all we do is to repeat the message with the voice in our head. So right now, you were reading "most of us repeat the message with the voice in our head."
Who is the person you, or your subconscious mind, believes most? Most of you will say - "I trust me, I believe me."
Now, when you read the text, the message or the voice of the author is in your mind. Silently, you repeat his message, the message of the author.
How powerful, if the message that is stated on the paper/ screen/ mobile phone is strong and convincing. The writer's voice or intention is in the reader's mind.
Wah ---- Imagine that.
That is where hypnotic language comes in. If you are able to write a message hypnotically, your message goes straight into the recipient's mind. And the mind is than not listening to some boring salesperson, but to its "owner." This is happening with messages that are not even covered up - but those that stare at you, in black and white, from the page or the screen in front of you.
Interesting, isn't it?
So, the challenge of course is to know what makes the recipient tick before you embark on writing a mail, SMS or letter.
What is driving the recipient? It is easy to see when you had have a conversation with the recipient already - you give back their words, in one way or another. Why? Because that is the way they wrote it to you, duh! Change it a bit here and there but when you find something that seems important to them, give it back to them.
These are the words that they liked. So why not repeating them?
If you do not know their style, still, you want to be careful about your writing style. You can use hypnotic language patterns to get the message across, because this will surely work. Don't you think?
(NLP in Asia)
leadership
nlp
neuro linguistic programming
business coaching
executive coaching
personal coaching
malaysia
hypnotherapy
hypnosis
training
nlp malaysia
Monday, July 17, 2006
NLP trainings and the way forward to overcome pain
When I went to the NLP training last weekend, I recognised two main things.
The first is that the participants were willing to change. They realised that they have to change something in their life - and the life of the loved ones, may be - and in their own. This is important.
I also found out that they had a lot of limited beliefs before joining the training, and I believe that they are not alone in this world with their limited beliefs. There were comments from participants about how the felt small and insignificant before the training, how much anger was inside of them, how they lacked confidence, or how they didn't know where to go.
Many, many felt relieved in the end of the training and new that they had initiated changes. That was the good part. Trainings in Neuro Linguistic Programming or NLP have the ability to transform personalities and give participants what they need and searched for.
I did my original training with NLP about two years back and I still feel it vibrating in my veins, and how it still helps me to transform my life on a constant basis (how else could I coach with NLP?). The requirements after any training is that you use what you learnt immediately. Even NLP, and even if NLP has been pushed down to a cellular level. The good part for me was that my trainer pushed it down via hypnotic sessions and that all what I learnt is still available to me when I need it - and comes out stronger and stronger and I get better and better.
The difference to other trainings is that NLP trainings leave a lasting impression and they enable participants to become flexible in any situation. Situations change, any minute of any day. It is most important to be flexible many times a day in your attitude and ultimately, in your behaviour towards yourself and others.
The difference to other trainings is that those trainings (e.g.; "traditional" sales trainings, self-help trainings) leave a script behind that participants can use. The challenge is that those scripts need changing based on contexts of situations - a one side fits all never helps. But, however, participants often only learn one set for many different situations.
Still there are challenges in NLP trainings. For the time being, the participants will move on with their life, and feel greatly empowered. Many will try to use NLP techniques in their life, personal or business. That is the wrong approach. NLP is not a technique to use, but a way to see the world with different eyes, endless curiosity and greater understanding. If participants understand this, they will go a long way.
It starts by understanding the pain that they are carrying within themselves and to learn just to let go. They have the tools, of course, and the patterns to apply. They now just need to use it more and more to live and regenerate their new life. Which means, for many, that there are great changes ahead - and change is always a lot of fun.
Those that I trained with, earlier, and that used NLP in their life experienced great changes. Some were promoted, others became self-employed, others found themselves and became very successful with their own identity and so on. They are the living proof that NLP works.
(NLP in Asia)
leadership
nlp
neuro linguistic programming
business coaching
executive coaching
personal coaching
malaysia
hypnotherapy
hypnosis
training
nlp malaysia
The first is that the participants were willing to change. They realised that they have to change something in their life - and the life of the loved ones, may be - and in their own. This is important.
I also found out that they had a lot of limited beliefs before joining the training, and I believe that they are not alone in this world with their limited beliefs. There were comments from participants about how the felt small and insignificant before the training, how much anger was inside of them, how they lacked confidence, or how they didn't know where to go.
Many, many felt relieved in the end of the training and new that they had initiated changes. That was the good part. Trainings in Neuro Linguistic Programming or NLP have the ability to transform personalities and give participants what they need and searched for.
I did my original training with NLP about two years back and I still feel it vibrating in my veins, and how it still helps me to transform my life on a constant basis (how else could I coach with NLP?). The requirements after any training is that you use what you learnt immediately. Even NLP, and even if NLP has been pushed down to a cellular level. The good part for me was that my trainer pushed it down via hypnotic sessions and that all what I learnt is still available to me when I need it - and comes out stronger and stronger and I get better and better.
The difference to other trainings is that NLP trainings leave a lasting impression and they enable participants to become flexible in any situation. Situations change, any minute of any day. It is most important to be flexible many times a day in your attitude and ultimately, in your behaviour towards yourself and others.
The difference to other trainings is that those trainings (e.g.; "traditional" sales trainings, self-help trainings) leave a script behind that participants can use. The challenge is that those scripts need changing based on contexts of situations - a one side fits all never helps. But, however, participants often only learn one set for many different situations.
Still there are challenges in NLP trainings. For the time being, the participants will move on with their life, and feel greatly empowered. Many will try to use NLP techniques in their life, personal or business. That is the wrong approach. NLP is not a technique to use, but a way to see the world with different eyes, endless curiosity and greater understanding. If participants understand this, they will go a long way.
It starts by understanding the pain that they are carrying within themselves and to learn just to let go. They have the tools, of course, and the patterns to apply. They now just need to use it more and more to live and regenerate their new life. Which means, for many, that there are great changes ahead - and change is always a lot of fun.
Those that I trained with, earlier, and that used NLP in their life experienced great changes. Some were promoted, others became self-employed, others found themselves and became very successful with their own identity and so on. They are the living proof that NLP works.
(NLP in Asia)
leadership
nlp
neuro linguistic programming
business coaching
executive coaching
personal coaching
malaysia
hypnotherapy
hypnosis
training
nlp malaysia
Thursday, July 13, 2006
Zizou's head-butt
I wonder, I really wonder.
Apparently, Zizou's (shortform for Zinedine Zidane) coach said that he understands Zizou's head-butt against his Italian opponent in the world-cup final France against Italy. It was just a few minutes left to the end of the game and Zizou would have been one of those guys needed for the upcoming penalty shootout. So he was send off.
France lost 5 : 3 in the end. If Zinedine Zidane would have been around, the mental health of his team would have been stronger and surely, the chances of him missing a penalty are slim.
He is highly paid, and he has a coach.
But what coach is he that he understands this action? I can understand a lot and a lot was going on in the final minutes of the game. Zidane was offended, and constantly insulted by his opponent. His pride was at stake, for sure and his mother, wife and sister badly insulted.
But in the end, he is responsible for the outcome he achieves. He choose to hit out.
In any thing that is happening, there is always a cause and an effect. A simple function of C/E. If you are feeling subjected to forces outside of you, that you blame are outside of your influence (government, sport, employer, client, school, you name it), you are at the effect side - the results of something. Something that you say you have no control over. What those "things" do to you is "making you sick", "they are unfair", "they treat you badly", "you gotta get back to them", and so on. Poor thing - you are living your life as a subject to something.
It is hard to do, but way more rewarding to say - I take responsibilty, I am 100% in charge of my life, I am designing my life, I change what I can change, I am not a blamer but will have the attitute, the strength and the integrity to do what I can do to make my life better.
Hey - simply, to make your life a WoW!
That means that while it might hurt badly to be insulted, to have your wife, kids, sister and mother getting insulted, not to go down to that low level, but walk proudly and strong and unaffected. Concentrating on what I want to achieve. In Zizou's case - he wanted to hold the World Cup in his hands. He should have focussed on that only and nothing else. Sure, it was hard, very hard, but then, isn't it even harder now?
So a coach shouldn't understand such behaviour, but get rid of it. Move his patient, player, whatever, to the Cause Side of things, and away of feeling exposed to circumstances that are away from your potential influence. To design the life and be powerful in times of adversity. Or, simply, to win the World Cup.
(NLP in Asia)
leadership
nlp
neuro linguistic programming
business coaching
executive coaching
personal coaching
malaysia
hypnotherapy
hypnosis
training
nlp malaysia
zidane
Apparently, Zizou's (shortform for Zinedine Zidane) coach said that he understands Zizou's head-butt against his Italian opponent in the world-cup final France against Italy. It was just a few minutes left to the end of the game and Zizou would have been one of those guys needed for the upcoming penalty shootout. So he was send off.
France lost 5 : 3 in the end. If Zinedine Zidane would have been around, the mental health of his team would have been stronger and surely, the chances of him missing a penalty are slim.
He is highly paid, and he has a coach.
But what coach is he that he understands this action? I can understand a lot and a lot was going on in the final minutes of the game. Zidane was offended, and constantly insulted by his opponent. His pride was at stake, for sure and his mother, wife and sister badly insulted.
But in the end, he is responsible for the outcome he achieves. He choose to hit out.
In any thing that is happening, there is always a cause and an effect. A simple function of C/E. If you are feeling subjected to forces outside of you, that you blame are outside of your influence (government, sport, employer, client, school, you name it), you are at the effect side - the results of something. Something that you say you have no control over. What those "things" do to you is "making you sick", "they are unfair", "they treat you badly", "you gotta get back to them", and so on. Poor thing - you are living your life as a subject to something.
It is hard to do, but way more rewarding to say - I take responsibilty, I am 100% in charge of my life, I am designing my life, I change what I can change, I am not a blamer but will have the attitute, the strength and the integrity to do what I can do to make my life better.
Hey - simply, to make your life a WoW!
That means that while it might hurt badly to be insulted, to have your wife, kids, sister and mother getting insulted, not to go down to that low level, but walk proudly and strong and unaffected. Concentrating on what I want to achieve. In Zizou's case - he wanted to hold the World Cup in his hands. He should have focussed on that only and nothing else. Sure, it was hard, very hard, but then, isn't it even harder now?
So a coach shouldn't understand such behaviour, but get rid of it. Move his patient, player, whatever, to the Cause Side of things, and away of feeling exposed to circumstances that are away from your potential influence. To design the life and be powerful in times of adversity. Or, simply, to win the World Cup.
(NLP in Asia)
leadership
nlp
neuro linguistic programming
business coaching
executive coaching
personal coaching
malaysia
hypnotherapy
hypnosis
training
nlp malaysia
zidane
Tuesday, July 11, 2006
What training participants said: This makes me proud
I am not a natural when it comes to blowing my horn about my success but here is something that I like to share.
Comments from my recent training participants from my company (my current "daytime job"):
"You are a very good trainer. Many thanks that you involved me in the NLP training. Really appreciated it and hope that we could have more this kind of training in future."
Participant from the IT Department
I really enjoyed the training and I think it really can add value to the team and also to me personally.
General Manager - Asian Region
"I am using "the tools" shared and we’ve been openly analyzing ourselves among colleagues."
Senior Manager
"It changed the way I look at the world. from yesterday onwards, I will be more observant and try to analyze other people more… Will also at a more conscious state when I move my body….body language will be more or less affected and I now know why my brother-in-law likes to look at the ceiling when I asked him questions."
Manager
"I basically liked all the training subject – the contents, the way they were presented and “role play”.
Manager
There are more comments on applicatbility of the training to team building, internal and external communication and so on, but these are the ones that fit best in here.
They are great affirmations that I am on my way!
I will expand this entry, since it is also good to read positive things when things don't work out that way and sometimes, they don't do. This then is the time where I need those comments.
(NLP in Asia)
leadership
nlp
neuro linguistic programming
business coaching
executive coaching
personal coaching
malaysia
hypnotherapy
hypnosis
training
nlp malaysia
Comments from my recent training participants from my company (my current "daytime job"):
"You are a very good trainer. Many thanks that you involved me in the NLP training. Really appreciated it and hope that we could have more this kind of training in future."
Participant from the IT Department
I really enjoyed the training and I think it really can add value to the team and also to me personally.
General Manager - Asian Region
"I am using "the tools" shared and we’ve been openly analyzing ourselves among colleagues."
Senior Manager
"It changed the way I look at the world. from yesterday onwards, I will be more observant and try to analyze other people more… Will also at a more conscious state when I move my body….body language will be more or less affected and I now know why my brother-in-law likes to look at the ceiling when I asked him questions."
Manager
"I basically liked all the training subject – the contents, the way they were presented and “role play”.
Manager
There are more comments on applicatbility of the training to team building, internal and external communication and so on, but these are the ones that fit best in here.
They are great affirmations that I am on my way!
I will expand this entry, since it is also good to read positive things when things don't work out that way and sometimes, they don't do. This then is the time where I need those comments.
(NLP in Asia)
leadership
nlp
neuro linguistic programming
business coaching
executive coaching
personal coaching
malaysia
hypnotherapy
hypnosis
training
nlp malaysia
Wednesday, July 05, 2006
Facilitator in NLP Certification Training
Hello and yuchee.
It is always fun to be acknowledged in an area of great interest, which, for me, is Neuro Linguistic Programming or NLP.
I have been invited by KL Success Shop and Power Events Asia to be a facilitator in a training for a NLP Practitioner Certification that takes place in Melaka. Sadly, I am only able to join them from tomorrow onwards, while the course started yesterday. Nevertheless, it is a great opportunity for me - in fact, a fantastic opportunity, considering that the light keeps shining on my future path.
I will facilitate the training of Dr. William D. Horton, one of the leading trainers in NLP in the US, and now also internationally. He is promoted as "the founder of the National Federation of Neurolinguistic Psychology, NFNLP, one of the fastest growing organizations for NLPers in the world. NFNLP serves as a network for professionals who use NLP to share experiences, new techniques and applications, and other useful information from their fields of expertise. NFNLP and Dr. Horton have changed the face of NLP forever."
A couple of great days ahead of me.
(NLP in Asia)
leadership
nlp
neuro linguistic programming
business coaching
executive coaching
personal coaching
malaysia
hypnotherapy
hypnosis
training
nlp malaysia
It is always fun to be acknowledged in an area of great interest, which, for me, is Neuro Linguistic Programming or NLP.
I have been invited by KL Success Shop and Power Events Asia to be a facilitator in a training for a NLP Practitioner Certification that takes place in Melaka. Sadly, I am only able to join them from tomorrow onwards, while the course started yesterday. Nevertheless, it is a great opportunity for me - in fact, a fantastic opportunity, considering that the light keeps shining on my future path.
I will facilitate the training of Dr. William D. Horton, one of the leading trainers in NLP in the US, and now also internationally. He is promoted as "the founder of the National Federation of Neurolinguistic Psychology, NFNLP, one of the fastest growing organizations for NLPers in the world. NFNLP serves as a network for professionals who use NLP to share experiences, new techniques and applications, and other useful information from their fields of expertise. NFNLP and Dr. Horton have changed the face of NLP forever."
A couple of great days ahead of me.
(NLP in Asia)
leadership
nlp
neuro linguistic programming
business coaching
executive coaching
personal coaching
malaysia
hypnotherapy
hypnosis
training
nlp malaysia
Man emerges from coma
Most people say that this is impossible - that someone emerges from a coma that lasted 19 years. Here, it happens and I am happy for the man, so rehabilitation will be tough. Imagine the change that the world underwent in the last 19 years, from the emergence of the Internet to 9/11 to oil crises and more.
Congratulations to Terry Wallis.
Doctors say that his brain was methodically rebuilding white matter, the infrastructure necessary to interact with the outside world - a very slow self-healing process.
(NLP in Asia)
leadership
nlp
neuro linguistic programming
business coaching
executive coaching
personal coaching
malaysia
hypnotherapy
hypnosis
training
nlp malaysia
Congratulations to Terry Wallis.
Doctors say that his brain was methodically rebuilding white matter, the infrastructure necessary to interact with the outside world - a very slow self-healing process.
(NLP in Asia)
leadership
nlp
neuro linguistic programming
business coaching
executive coaching
personal coaching
malaysia
hypnotherapy
hypnosis
training
nlp malaysia
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
